Over the week-end, a friend sent me these Punju-truths. I am a proud Punjabi with cousins from Delhi to Amritsar and could identify with these witty Delhi-isms. Would love more Punju-truths over week-ends.
ABC OF PUNJABIS
A is for Adjust, Punjabis will always ask you to adjust whenever they want to push you around.
B is for Backside, and it has nothing to do with your bum, it is an instruction to go to the rear of a building, or block, or shop or whatever.
C is for cloney and its first name is not George nor is it a process for replicating sheep – it is an area where people live eg. Dfence cloney.
E is for expanditure – and believe me Punjabis are not scared of spending money – the latest cars, marble floors, their ambitions are always expanding.
F is for fackade, and even though it sounds like a bad word it is actually just the front of a building (with backside being the back, of course).
G is for Gaddi and the way a Punjabi can pilot a car puts any F1 driver to shame, if the Grand Prix does come to Delhi there's no way Hamilton, Alonso or Kimi can overtake Balvinder, Jasvinder and Sukhvinder.
H is for Ho Jayega, the moment you hear that, you have to be very careful because you can be reasonably sure it's not going to happen.
I is for Intezaar… to know more about it see P.
J is for Jindagi and if there's one person who knows how to live life to the full it's a Punjabi.
K is for Khanna, Khurana, etc – the Punjabi equivalent of the Johnses ie, keeping up with the Khuranas.
L is for Lovely but she never is. Nor is Sweety.
M is for Mrooti – the car that moved an entire Punjabi generation.
N is for No problem ji - to find out how that works see H.
O is for Oye which can be surprise (oyye!), a hailing (oyy), anger (OYY) or pain (oy oy oy).
P is for Panch minit and no matter how near (1 km) or far a Punjabi is from you (100 km) they usually say they'll reach you in panch minit.
Q is for Queue for which there's really no word in Punjabi.
R is for Riks and a Punjabi is always prepared to take one, even if the odds are against them.
S is for Sweetie, Bunty, Pappu and Sonu who seem to own half the cars in Delhi.
T is for the official bird of Punjab – Tandoori chicken.
U is for when U lose your sex appeal and become 'Uncle' ji.
V is for VIP phone numbers @ Rs 15 lakh and counting.
W is War – on the roads.
X is x-rated words they flow freely in casual conversations on the street.
Y is 'You nonsense', anger replacing vocabulary in a shouting match. And
Z is for Zig zag for which you should see G, M and P.